Working Mom Diaries: If Only I Had It All Together

If only I had it all together:photo-2 copy

  • I wouldn’t have 18,000 plus emails in my inbox
  • I wouldn’t have deodorant in my desk drawer for the days that I forget to put it on
  • I wouldn’t realize (at noon) that I had dried spit up down the back of my dress
  • I wouldn’t forget that today was our turn to bring a healthy snack to school
  • I wouldn’t fail to call my friends on their birthdays
  • I wouldn’t consider a People magazine article a long read
  • I wouldn’t realize with one diaper left that the shipment wasn’t going to arrive until tomorrow

If I had it all together:

  • I’d smell like Tory Burch’s latest fragrance and not peanut butter
  • I’d pack a well balanced lunch for my daughter where the food was cut into cute shapes
  • I’d exercise more frequently rather than just spend time in my exercise clothes
  • I’d add activities to our family calendar as soon as I commit to them
  • I’d never leave the diaper bag at home when I’m already running late
  • I’d have an extra set of birthday and welcome baby gifts for “just in case”
  • I’d look a little less like Pigpen from Peanuts when I walked into any room followed by a cloud of dust

I have spent countless hours being envious of those women who seem to have it all together. They have calendars that are color coded and send written RSVPs to accept invitations to birthday parties. They remember the anniversary of the day you met and read really intellectual books.

I want to be more like them, but I have learned that being envious hasn’t done much to reduce the number of my emails currently sitting unread. All I can do is wake up each day being a better version of myself than I was the day before. I can try harder to be a better me, but I no longer feel the need to be a different me. It’s a constant and evolving journey to accepting myself as I am, shortcomings and all.

At the end of the day, my family loves me despite my email count.

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